It has been awhile since I’ve posted anything here. Which is a shame because I had hoped to update often — working overnights has made my sleeping schedule so messed up that I end up sleeping all day instead of doing anything productive. However, I’m going to try and fix that.
Recently I’ve decided to rewrite and edit some of the stories I’ve written over the last four years or so with plans to self publish a select few of them. Some of the rewrites are in the hope of actually finishing the story though. I’m starting with a horror novella entitled Brilliant Red. So far I’ve added quite a bit to the original while rewriting. Of course if I’m going to end up self-publishing it as an ebook that means I may end up taking it down from wattpad. Still not sure about everything though…
I did publish a paperback of Maki: SOLAR on createspace, but that was only because I wanted a physical copy for myself. ^^;; I do want to write the prequel to SOLAR and try self-publishing that along with resubmitting SOLAR under my real name instead of the fake name I use for some websites. Not sure yet. SOLAR was a NaNo novel so
most of the time I sometimes feel like it isn’t ever really going to be as good as I want it to be. No matter how much I rewrite it or edit it.
As far as language learning goes, I’ve decided on Japanese and have been doing pretty well in studying it exclusively. I’m still having trouble with remembering Kana, oddly enough I remember kanji better… but with my sister at basic training I’ve been able to study more since she’s not here to distract me with the temptation of video games.
*Warning: this is a unedited, rambling post*
I did complete Nano, but it was difficult. The story kind of dissolved into a incoherent mess by the midway point. I hope it’s something I can fix, if not I’m not too worried about it. Goodbye Summer was never supposed to be a serious work anyway, I have better ideas and things that fit my style more anyway.
The end of the year is approaching and I haven’t seriously worked on a piece of writing since November 2012 (when I got my job). Every time I sit down and try to write I become easily distracted with something else or I’m too tired to focus on writing anything. I used to love writing and did it all the time, updating my stories on Wattpad quite regularly, now I update a story every couple of months and there are stories laying around, waiting for an update when it’s been almost a year (and in some cases longer than a year) since the last time I touched the story.
I don’t know where my will went or why I don’t find all that much joy in writing anymore. It’s frustrating because I would really like to finish a couple of stories and I had planned on finishing at least two this year, but that is most likely not going to happen now. I need to find motivation again. There are a lot of things I want to write, a bunch of stories I want to tell – and maybe that’s the problem. Maybe there are too many stories I want to write. It’s hard to focus on just one thing when there are so many ideas floating around in my head. But how do you stop new ideas from coming? sigh
I have tomorrow off work. I’m going to sit down and disconnect the internet, unplug the TV and try to actually write something. Maybe I can finish one story by the end of the year. Maybe…
But which one~
So, I had a bad start and only wrote about 2,000 words within the first four days. The excitement I had for Separation Anxiety had dissipated by the time I got home from work on the first of November. I tried to write, but nothing was working. When my fingers would touch the keyboard I’d just sit there staring at my screen for a few moments and then my hand would reach for the mouse and I was wasting my time away on tumblr.
Six days into NaNo I have decided to change my idea back to my original one. The one I didn’t outline, the one idea I was excited for a few months before. I thought that it would be too much to take on in November, but now I’m thinking differently. I want to write it now, not later. So, instead of Separation Anxiety, I’ll be writing Goodbye Summer and possibly its prequel Love Summer (depending on how far I manage to get into the first story).
Now I’m dealing with a new cast of characters, each more exciting than the characters for Separation Anxiety and I’m writing YA, something I’ve never really done before. Most of my stories have young characters, but it’s never centered around the fact that they’re young and growing up and learning. So this is a first for me. It hasn’t been many years since I was a teenager, but I was such a well-behaved teen with well-behaved friends that it might be a difficult task to portray the characters of Goodbye Summer.
I’m hoping to reach 15,000 words before I go to bed tonight and I’m still debating on whether or not I want to post this NaNo on wattpad. While it might be nice to enter the NaNo thing they have going on, I’m not sure if it’s appropriate to post… I guess I can edit the chapters before posting and omit the more explicit scenes and phrases.
Hmm… Well, I’ll figure out something. I hope anyone else doing NaNo is having better luck than me!